Wednesday, October 26, 2005
ahhh. its been one whole long week since i last blogged. its so strange. its like before promos u can't wait for exams to end so you can go online or go out or go down, but once promos are over, you don't feel like doing anything at all. well at least thats for me. i even had a whole long list ready for the things to do after promos, and so far there are less than 7 ticks.naima won! *woot.* i am so happy happy happy! well i mean i knew she'd won since like 1001 years ago but you know...its the actual thing itself. its just kind of beautiful. the final runway segment was so awe-inspiring. and kahlen really is pretty, she just looks kind of washed out without make-up. plus, naima has tons more star quality. :) i know i know.been out and towning and what not but i cant really rmb what where who. its just a big blur and i really don't feel like dissecting everything, and i'm not going to leave that for the next post cuz i hate doing that as i'll definitely forget and the feelings are all gone anyway SO, i'm just not going to talk about them at all. oh! i promoted. haha!!! that was sort of an afterthought wasn't it. oh well the entire arts fac promoted as well, same as last year. i am eternally grateful to myself for choosing Arts. lol. i had to drop math too! haha! this is like my birthday come early!! (its Dec 8 for those who don't know) hee.i actually had to go sch on TIME on tues to hand in the drop sub form, and there was this looonnggg loooongggg (you get the idea) queue inside the GO. haha. looks like its not just an arts thing. in fact, there were quite a few retainees for science. the poor peeps who have to change their syllabus entirely. what with the H1 and H2 and H5N1 strain and all. haha jk.anyway, was waiting inside GO, bumped into rach ong. when she found out i was dropping math, she instantly said: this must be the happiest day of your life huh.haha! in retrospect, i suppose it should have been, i mean i've hated math all along. but somehow, i've become so, well not used, but resigned to the fact that its stuck in my life that now when its about to disappear, i actually feel kind of...scared. apprehensive. what is life going to be like without math? great, definitely. no offence to all the crazy math freaks out there. haha. but at the same time, what am i losing? a possible A. i got those bloody As for Os, even though i'd been failing horrifically throughout my 4 yrs in NY. (this just goes to show that math is a straight dead boring bloody useless no-brainer for muggers who practise everyday but never mind about that.) its just...i know i'll have to start working for those As for As but thats not me. i just...oh god never mind. i sound like a spoilt brat.throughout that day, i kept thinking about what she said, that i should be happy, this is one of those perfect days. but of course if perfect days existed, singapore just might snow. i don't believe that there are perfect days. there will always be smth, no matter how insignificant, that gets you down. there are bad days, worse than bad days, days where you want to die, average days, better than average days, good days, but never perfect days. in your mind, perhaps you'll think thats so not true, there was that class outing at sentosa or smth like O level results release day was flawless for me.But in reality, your brain has simply glossed over all the negative stuff, because of your desire to preserve that fleeting euphoria for the rest of your life. its simply pushed the bad stuff to the back of your mind, or simply ignored it. memories can be deceiving.anyway. what was this whole post about anyway. oh i like stef sun's new song, wan mei de yi tian. HAHA! yeah i think that was what this post was about. the fugging irony. hahaha.and i felt that i owed my math teacher something too. when i told him i wanted to drop, he was so nice about it that i actually felt miserable. sometimes i hate it when teachers are too nice, cuz u start to feel guilty. like if i'd failed chem for Os, i would have blamed yeo and hated her forever and ever. but if i'd failed english (choy), i would have felt really guilty and hated MYSELF forever, cuz i liked siva koh. ok i'd better stop in case any MOE official is reading this. And so in my opinion, what i've been trying to say for this whole post is that project work sucks.HAHAHA! randomness-